literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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