ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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