Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
