kristin has been a bad kristin
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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