I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He passed out mid-signature
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
