oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize