hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
