Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
