Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
