WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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