Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
