I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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