idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
