It's Friday. Sex?
thus making me awesome and them whores
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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