I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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