You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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