I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I checked into jail on foursquare
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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