Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
