So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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