Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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