He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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