i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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