the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Someone shattered a urinal.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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