I CAN MOONWALK!
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Randomize
