is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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