Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
There are leaves in my underwear?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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