my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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