What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
