Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
