Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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