Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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