i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Come see our sink grown plant.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
