No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I think people are normalizing furries
Just puked most of my soul out..
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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