So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Boobs speak an international language.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
