I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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