I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
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Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
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I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
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