My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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