He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
