It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
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i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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