At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize