Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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