You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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