If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
tell me about the eggs
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize