the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
