I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
