Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
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