508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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