When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
