brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I want her autograph on my taint
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
