I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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