FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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